“Where do you see yourself in five years!?”

“When’s your next rant coming about!?” a dear friend asked.

“I don’t know ya!” I remembered I had a blog to run.

So, this is about the time I tried to get myself an interview a long, long time ago.

I had usually been good at interviews. I’d walk in like Rekha at Filmfare and march out with multiple lifetime achievement awards. Yes, I thought I was that good up until this episode.

I had parked myself on a fancy couch in a well lit office space waiting to be ushered in with the occasional shower of rose petals. That didn’t happen. I must say I was a tad bit disappointed. Instead, I was stationed in front of three industry veterans. It wasn’t intimidating at all (it felt a lot like an interrogation).

The first fifteen minutes went by talking about work and location and the mundane. But that was just the first few minutes.

I believe we have all grown up watching Bournvita Quiz Contest. I found myself in it; without a buzzer or a partner.

“Who’s Usain Bolt?” 

Thank God I knew.

“Who’s the fastest swimmer?” 

Blank (technical glitch with the imaginary buzzer)

“Which year was the last cricket world cup?”

I knew that and I also added some unwanted information.

“Who’s Chanda Kochar?” 

A distraught woman these days? (I should have asked)

“Tell me something about the Democrats.” 

Umm…they aren’t Republicans? (that was really smart)

“Where’s Buffalo?”  

Parked outside (I wanted to say).

This went on for about an hour. I was uninterested and tired. I stopped listening after a point. I looked out of the window instead. I was trying to locate my car; see if I could jump out of the window and miraculously land in my car. The banyan tree blocked my view. I started counting the birds on its branches.

“Why do you want to join us?” (I didn’t realize the rapid fire was still on)

I don’t. Not anymore (That’s not what I said as I saw my brain crawling out and leaving the building).

“Do you want to ask us anything?” 

Yes. When is this episode going to be aired? 

mr-before-walking-into-a-job-interview-41437

GiF from Google images.

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